The Real LA Noire

If you're anything like us, you've been knee deep in the awesome new mystery game, LA Noire. If you're younger than us, you probably think that it's boring and not action heavy enough. Fine. Be that way. Ass. But if you're too old to play video games and still do, you know how awesome it is to be a detective in 1940's Los Angeles. It makes you feel like a kick ass sword of justice. So leave it to Funny or Die to give a bit more reality to what your super cop in LA Noire is more accurately like.

Real Life L.A. Noire - watch more funny videos

Happy Memorial Day

In honor of fallen heroes. I bring you the most disturbing video you've ever seen. Let FREEDOM ring!!!

Free Comic Book Day!

It's almost one of the greatest days of the year! This year Free Comic Book Day is on May 7th! Hurray.

Yep, Free Comic Book Day, the one day of the year where you can go to your favorite comic shop and pick up comic books, FOR FREE! Shit, it's exciting.

This year look for books with Spider Man, Darkwing Duck, Green Lantern, Betty and Veronica, Locke and Key, 2000 AD, Inspector Gadget, The Misadventures of Adam West and many more great books.

While you're out reaping the rewards of this awesome day, don't forget to check out some new books. There are a bunch of kick ass titles coming out every week. Wasn't your New Years resolution to do more awesome, nerdy stuff this year. There's no way that cute girl in home room is ever going to go to prom with you if you don't know what's happening in the Fear Itself arc. So pick up some new books to thank you're comic shop for just giving you some others. And think of all the money that you'll save by staying home and reading comics rather than spending thousands of dollars at the bar every night. You'll thank me later.

Star Wars Blu Ray

This is the image that I got in my e-mail from StarWars.com Yep, a big hint at the reveal for the Star Wars Blu Ray disks that I can't stop waiting for.

Now you probably already know that Sept. 16th of this year Lucasfilm is releasing all of the Star Wars movies on glorious Blu Ray format. There has been a lot of talk from Lucasfilm about all the extras that will be packed on to the disks. Evidently on May 4th we'll all finally get to stop speculating and know what bountiful goodies await us from the Star Wars archives.

Damn. I wish I could just fast forward to September already...

Call Of The Dead

Sure, you thought that Call of Duty Black Ops couldn't kick any more ass. Well you couldn't be any more wrong. On May 3rd we're going to be treated to a new DLC, and a big part of that DLC will be Call of the Dead. Yep, they're adding more zombie awesomeness to Black Ops. But wait, there's more! Danny Trejo, Robert Englund, Sarah Michelle Geller and Michael Rooker are on board. It looks kind of like Black Ops meets Left 4 Dead. And it looks 100% kick ass. You know what I'll be doing May 3rd.

Spider-Sulu

It's well known that Spider Man Turn Off The Dark can't stop having huge problems. It's crashing and burning in an amazing and epic manor. Too bad though because in theory it could be cool. But, sadly it's just a big joke. So how do you save one of Broadways biggest bombs? Give the lead to George Takei. Obviously. I'm kind of shocked this hasn't been thought of sooner.

Evil Dead The Phone Game!

Ash is back! Well, as always, sort of. In this iteration, Evil Dead returns again as a game. So pick up your boomstick and your iPad or iPhone and get ready to kick some Deadite ass. Ghost House Pictures has teamed with Trigger Apps to bring even more signature Evil Dead style and fun to our portable media devices. The game should be around $2.99 for the phone version and $4.99 for your iPad. It's a 3D shooter where you take control of Ash and help him lead his group of friends though Deadite infested levels. Iconic weaponry from the game will be used to dispatch the Deadites with Ash's trademark swagger. How much does it kick ass that 30 years after it's release we're still getting fresh Evil Dead content. If you didn't say a lot of ass then you're on the wrong website. Sure, we'd all love to see a new Evil Dead or Army of Darkness film, but that's not going to happen. Maybe a re-make down the line, but seriously, it's not gonna be Bruce Campbell good. Apps like this game and all the Evil Dead comics are a godsend for old horror fans like me. The game should be out in a few weeks, just in time for spring. And lets be honest with each other, you'd rather be inside playing Evil Dead on your iPad than out in the sun anyway.

The Lords of Salem

Rob Zombie has a new low budget horror film in the works. The Lords of Salem is Zombie's new project and while there is little news about the film thus far, to the right you can see a teaser poster that Zombie released today. The movie is produced by the guys who brought us Insidious and Paranormal Activity.

Here's what Zombie has given as the synopsis; "The story is about a local DJ who mistakenly unleashes a hellish curse on the town. 300 Years earlier on the very streets of Salem that the townspeople walk on today, innocent folks were rounded up from their homes, convicted of being witches and sentenced to death. The Lords of Salem ran the town with an iron fist, but for four witches who were tortured and killed in secrecy vowed that one day they would be back for revenge."

Well, that sounds pretty bad ass. And since it's an original movie Zombie can't ruin it for me like he did the Halloween movies. I've always loved Zombie's visual style and the dark and dirty horror that he produces. Really gonna be keeping my eye on this one. If it's original horror from Rob Zombie, I'm there opening day. Keep it up, Rob. And make T-Rex after this one. Or Werewolf Women of the SS. I would love to see either make it to the big screen.

Homefront Review By Nick

Well, I finally took the time to play Homefront, the new FPS from KAOS and THQ. The single player story line was written by John Milius, the writer of Apocalypse Now and Red Dawn. That guy looks like Walter from The Big Lebowski, so there's no way that the story can't kick ass.

Well, you know what? The single player story does kick ass, and fairly mightily. The year 2027 and you've been arrested by the United Korean Government. See, this wicked lead up video that is at the bottom of this review tells the story of how North and South Korea have joined to become Super Korea and kick the shit out of the rest of the world. Where the game begins, Korea pretty much runs most of Asia and has recently invaded a poverty stricken United States. You're a resistance fighter trying to get your America on and kick some Korean ass. Your plan, to retake San Fransisco. I don't know, maybe the Koreans stole your Prius or something and you're mighty pissed.

The game play is pretty basic for an FPS but it's a formula that works. What really kept me in this game was the story. Sure, military FPS games are a god damn dime a dozen these days, but in Homefront, they really lay the story on thick. You are one of the last hopes for American liberation. You're fighting your way through US cities en route to San Fransisco where you will aide in the re-taking of the Golden Gate Bridge. And this game gets your blood up. There are around three "holy shit" moments that I recall from my first play through that really make you want to shoot the shit out of some invaders. As with most FPS's the story mode isn't that long. All in all though I found it fairly rewarding and I would like to see some DLC that continues the story, not just enhances the On-Line play.

The On-Line play in general is pretty fun. Points given out for kills and all that other stuff that you're used to from an On-Line FPS. Some standout features that I really liked were that you have have up to 32 player ground wars. That's a lot of annoying British kids calling me a fag. Also, unlike say Black Ops, the online is very vehicles based. As you build your kill count you can afford to use the points you accrued to purchase different vehicles. From your basic tanks to different types of airborne implements of destruction.

Overall I think that Homefront is a very entertaining FPS. Sure, when I'm looking for an On-Line Deathmatch I'm probably going to throw in Halo Reach or Black Ops, but Homefront gives a nice break from those from time to time. What really drew me into this game was the story. I love a good story in a game. Hell, one of my favorite parts of the Halo franchise is the depth of the story and the universe that they've created. So yea, Homefront really scratches that vengeance/shoot him in the fucking head itch. So this July 4th, do what I'm going to do. Watch Independence Day, get hammered, eat some sort of meat that you forgot about on the grill and is wicked overcooked but you're too drunk to go to the store and way too drunk to think to order a pizza, and liberate the shit out of San Fransisco on Homefront. God Bless Video Games!

Yoostar 2 Can't Be This Cool

You know what video game heros that we all are here at The Nothing Files. Well, I keep hearing about this Yoostar 2 in the movies game for the Xbox 360 and PS3. It looks bad ass. Super bad ass actually. You get to put yourself into famous scenes from your favorite movies. Fuck. Bad ass. Well, maybe. I probably can't act at all and the game will tell me the extent to which I can't. Just like Rock Band taught me that I can't sing, Def Jam Rap Star taught me that I can't rap, and DJ Hero taught me that I will never have sex with a girl that I just met at a party. But this game looks so fun... If only I had friends like Jay Baruchel to play it with...

Yoo Are King Leonidas - watch more funny videos

Fear Itself

The Marvel Universe is facing it's next big cross-over event this summer; Fear Itself. Now I haven't been able to find much out about it, but given this trailer, I'm guessing it's Marvels answer to Blackest Night. Sure, there's probably no zombies, but they already have the Marvel Zombies hit and miss line. Welcome terror to the Marvel Universe.

The Governator

Wow. I really wish that I were making this up.

Seems like Arnold has teamed up with Stan "The Man" Lee for a new animated show. Shit. So, it's like Stripperella with less animated boobs. Awesome.

In the actually trailer below you will see Arnold step down as California's Governor then enter the quite private sector. As we all know that entails retreating to your huge mansion and fighting evil Transformers in your powered suit. Arnie even gets to practice his golf swing and throw around some Matrix moves. Um, bad ass?

So yea. Let's give you all a look at the kind of crap that gets green lit these days.

Green Lantern WonderCon

Well, it's been almost a year since I've posted and since then there has been almost nothing about the new Green Lantern film. There's a lot of speculation out there that that's mostly due to the fact that the movie sucks and the studio doesn't want people to find out so they can still get a good box office. I have to be honest. I've never been that big into Green Lantern. Sure, he always seemed cool, and Blackest Night kicked ass. It's just not a character that I ever really followed. That's on me I guess. I will say that this new footage from WonderCon seems pretty soild. Sure, it's way CGI heavy, but a GL film pretty much has to be. Hopefully the rumors of GL in this film having too much Ryan Reynolds humor could be true, but I'll give it a chance. There's no way that it can be Spider Man 3 bad.

X-Men 1st Class Retro Credits

Well, it's been almost a year since the last post. Sorry about that. I blame Thom. It must have taken something pretty cool to get me to dust the old site off, and it sure has. Here is a title crawl for the new X-Men First Class movie. Now this title crawl will never been seen in theaters. Just kind of a teaser they put out to build hype. And I think that it's bad ass. I'm really not excited with what I've seen so far out of the First Class reboot/prequil. Even after I heard that Cable will show up to introduce a timeline changing event that will make this film separate from the ones that have already come out. But this trailer rocks. I love the uber 60's slant that they put on it. So while I'm still not sure that the movie itself won't suck, here's an awesome trailer to set you up for some epic dissapointment.

X-Men: First Class Title Sequence from Joe D! on Vimeo.

The Green Lantern

Well, here you have it. A highly anticipated look at Ryan Reynolds as the Green Lantern.

It's actually kind of cool. Suits all CGI and all that. I'm wondering if they're doing that so that his suit can morph from the ring powers at different points in the movie. Or maybe I'll glow differently depending on his strength or focus. Anyway, I really don't think it looks all that bad.

So, there it is. Deadpool as Green Lantern. I actually kind of like Reynolds so I'll be really looking forward to this one coming out.

This Changes Everything ...Again

So, I am the lame half of The Nothing Files cause I don't have an iPhone 4 yet. Well, guess what? There's no way in hell that I'm standing in line for more than a half an hour for anything, much less a goddamn phone. And out here in LA people started lining up at 4am for the motherfucker. Nope. That's Twilight territory in my book and I refuse to go there. So I'll be one of the lame masses that doesn't start getting additional radiation pumped into their ear for about another month or so. But to celebrate the unveiling of the greatest invention ever, our friends at Funny or Die have a great "outtakes" iPhone 4 video. Watch it on your iPhone. Unless you can't cause it's a flash video or something...

iPhone 4 Video - The Deleted Scenes from Adam Scott

Adidas Star Wars Commercial

Yep. This is awesome. Daft Punk and Snoop Dogg in the cantina at Moss Eisley? One of the coolest things ever. I love the internet!

Batman City Of Scars

This new short film has been all the buzz on the interwebs these days. Batman City Of Scars is a half hour of awesome and now you can watch the whole thing right here on your favorite website, The Nothing Files. Again, you're welcome.

Winnebago Man Trailer

Ok, everyone knows that awesome YouTube video of that Winnebago guy just freaking out and swearing all the time. Yea, it's one of my favorites too. Well, seems as though some tenacious filmmakers have hunted him down, and even made a documentary about the guy. Yep, sounds awesome right? Well, here it is, the trailer to Winnebago Man. I cannot wait to check this out! Now to wait for Winnebago Man the Musical!

Your Daily Devo

Are we not men?

Fallout New Vegas

It's time to return to the post apocalyptic wastelands of Fallout in a new chapter called New Vegas. How sweet was Fallout 3? Yep. Totally wicked sweet. The 1950's feel in the barren wastes, killing mutants and giant ants... Man, that was a great game. And you could nuke a city. Right around the beginning of the game! How awesome is that?! So imagine how excited we here at The Nothing Files are for Fallout New Vegas. Check out this trailer then go and buy me a sandwich and a Nuke Cola. I've earned it.

Dead Rising 2 Case: 0

Here's another video of awesomeness from E3. Can't wait for Dead Rising 2? Fuck, I can't either. Fortunately we're gonna get a taste sooner than I would have thought. Exclusively on XBox is Dead Rising 2 Case: 0. Set 2 years before the events of the game. And the best part? All the stuff you unlock for your character, including leveling up, carries over into the main Dead Rising 2 game itself. It's a DLC only game, but I've yet to be able to pin down a release date. One would have to think that it will be soon though, as Dead Rising 2 is slated for August 31. Enjoy the zombie mayhem!

Sony E3 2010 Games

Don't think that Sony was sitting at E3 on it's sore, calloused thumbs. They brought some sick looking games, and here are some of the highlights. New Gran Turismo 5, Socom 4, Infamous 2, Killzone 3, and finally, after years of waiting, a new Twisted Metal! Yep. E3 is aw some. Here's a mashup trailer for all those games from GameTrailers.com.

Rage

ID, the company that brought us the O.G. FPS's, Wolfenstein and the Doom and Quake series, is working on a new shooter. Rage has been building a huge buzz at E3 this year, and I've got a video from the greatest network ever, G4, sitting down and checking out a demo of it. Rage looks nuts and I can't wait for them to finish it and ship it.

Nintendo 3DS Trailer E3 2010

I got a chance to meet the CEO of Nintendo America, Reggie Fils-Amie, yesterday and he told me that he was confidant that Nintendo had "won E3" this year. A big reason for all the buzz around Nintendo is their announcement of their new handheld, the 3DS. Here's the E3 video proving that Nintendo will never stop being weird and Japanese.